inbox. [jikan]

[faeshim]

Comments

[privatechat]

If he was hungry or he couldn't control himself because he wouldn't eat then he would be upset... you would also worry and I didn't want you to worry or be sad.

I was scared and it did hurt but you were there and I trusted you.

[faeshim]

i care about you too

i worry about you too

you don't have to sacrifice yourself for him or for me. i will find a way to take care of you all.

[privatechat]

I'm not as scared now, Daeshim. I can do this anytime he needs. I... didn't know how it was going to happen and... that's what scared me more than anything. I felt like I didn't have any control because I didn't know... But I know now how it feels and works.

You don't have to take care of everything or me. I've always taken care of myself. It's okay.

[faeshim]

knowing doesn't stop you from bleeding.

that was before. you're mine now.

[privatechat]

I don't even have a mark, Daeshim.

[faeshim]

only because bae is very gentle. any other vampire and who knows.

[privatechat]

Well, I'm feeding him not any other vampire. Don't try to control me, Daeshim.

[faeshim]

[lennon misunderstands him. the fae was just worried, trying to say that he cares about him-

it can't be helped.]

[privatechat]

[ At first, Lennon doesn't think too much about the silence... but then it goes on a little too long. ]

Daeshim... don't stop talking to me. You didn't even say the game was over.

[faeshim]

[it goes on for longer. daeshim doesn't like conflict. sometimes, this is how he deals with it. he runs away, and this time leaves his device behind.

but eventually:]

it's your turn.

[privatechat]

What did I do wrong to upset you?

[faeshim]

[he's not sure he wants to answer that. but rules are rules, and while he probably could find a loophole in them, maybe it wouldn't be a good idea.]

my intentions were not what you think. you assumed the worst.

[privatechat]

[ Lennon wonders if they shouldn't finish this up in person but there's something nice about being able to take the time to formulate responses. ]

Then explain, Dae. Because it felt a lot like you were trying to make a decision for me again.

[faeshim]

[unseelie. rising.]

again?

you do as you wish all the time.

you play games when you want.

you give your blood to who you want.

sell your body to who you want too.

where is my control that annoys you so?

[privatechat]

[ Lennon flinches as he reads the messages, there's something in it that hurts and pokes at insecurities and it shouldn't right?

He wants to point out that their whole first meeting started with Daeshim deciding that now Lennon belongs to him.

But he's over that. Mostly.

What is he supposed to say? ]

What do you want from me?

[faeshim]

[he frowns. frowns some more. but gradually it softens. the shadows in him settle.]

i want you to feel for me what i feel for you.

[privatechat]

Can you come here and tell me what you feel for me?

[faeshim]

[silence again, but only because he didn't think it was really necessary to respond when he's just going over there like asked.

but he's a bit of a mess when he arrives, purple curls stained with half-dried blood, a little of it on his shirt and skin too. and from his head, the babiest of baby deer antlers. there's even still velvet on them.]

I'm here.

[privatechat]

[ When Daeshim arrive, Lennon's clearly a bit anxious. He's rubbing at his arm as he sits on the bed, chewing on his bottom lip with sharp teeth and all -- he's going to figure out how to file those down without it hurting like hell at some point. His tail is flicking.

It doesn't help that when he sees Daeshim he has blood on him.... He frowns, staring at him and are those... antlers... ]

What...happened?

[faeshim]

They're too small.

[he sounds disappointed, almost embarrassed. where's the rest of him, the bones and ancient wood, the skull and antlered being floating above the ruinwood like something out of a nightmare? he looks more like a yearling.]

[privatechat]

That's not an answer!

[ Lennon stands up and goes over to him. He reaches out to touch and then he's looking at where there's blood and his face is concerned. He's already on edge from their conversation. From the long silence, from those messages. It makes him angry. Anger. Yeah, that's it. That's why his eyes are getting wet.

He pushes the other's shoulder. ]

Are you hurt? There's blood!

[faeshim]

It doesn't hurt.

[well, it doesn't now that lennon is fussing over him. he likes the way that that feels.]

I change. When I'm upset. When I'm unhappy. Turn into one thing or another. [daeshim slumps against him.] They'll go away. Probably.

[privatechat]

[ Lennon might still be about to cry but he is trying, very hard, not to. He wraps his arms around the other and then starts pulling him toward the bathroom. He doesn't care about the antlers -- whether they stay or go... the blood bothers him. ]

I made you unhappy and upset...

[ He exhales and he starts pulling off the other's dirty clothes in the bathroom, pausing to rub his face briefly because he is so not going to cry. ]

[faeshim]

[hopefully daeshim's smile is soft and secret enough that lennon doesn't see it. but he likes this, being marched into the bathroom, having his clothes pulled off of him. this is what love feels like him.

so it startles him a little when he sees the wetness of the human's eyes, and the way he rubs his face to fight it.]

No...well- [a frown returns to his lips, but only because he's trying to figure out his thoughts and put them into words.] You do make me happy.

[privatechat]

[ Lennon focuses to finish undressing Daeshim then he undresses himself but there's nothing sexual about this. He just... wants to help Daeshim clean up and he wanted those clothes off of him.

But when they're both naked he just stands there, not quite looking at Daeshim. ]

But I upset you...do things I do upset you and you don't tell me?