[he addresses that first because it's easy. he's only upset that he can't be a source himself. he doesn't want to think that lennon's only reason is the idea that he's donating in his place. other than that, it warms his heart more than anything.]
I think you're very generous for it. I'm grateful that he can count on you.
[and he knows that baein is grateful too, for many reasons. daeshim wraps his arms around him, trailing his fingers down along his spine. now, back to the other thing.]
I...would be pleased with that. You can always have sex for acorns instead! I have plenty!
[ Lennon is fond of Baein and he wants to help him but it would be a lie to say that his motivation isn't primarily based in making sure Daeshim doesn't worry and is happy. He nods, a little relieved. ]
I want to help him.
[ He understands Baein a lot...and well they're figuring out their own dynamic bit by bit.
He relaxes as the other's arms wrap around him and he rests his cheek on his shoulder. There's not long ago that he would have had trouble not turning this sexual. Where the intimacy and affection of just... being and holding someone you care about, being held and talking things through would have been too much. He's still skittish.
But Daeshim had given him a gift by telling him he loved him and then not pressing for him to say it back, not pushing the fact that he said it in his face over and over. It's the first time he'd heard that word toward himself in so long and it meant a lot, it meant just as much that Daeshim didn't attach pressure or expectation to his love.
Lennon laughs, and he lightly reaches back to swat at the other's hand and presses a kiss to the curve of the other's neck. ]
You don't have to give me acorns.
[ He'll talk to Jasper about his other options and he'll make sure that Daeshim is okay with what he definitely settles on. ]
You're holding out for my snake skin and quartz crystals...clever!
[daeshim would give them to him. he'd share all his little treasures if lennon wanted them.
it feels nice like this, with nothing between them and no expectation of anything more. he gets the feeling that that's somewhat rare among humans, and even more so with lennon.]
We can get out, before you get too cold.
[just because he's enjoying it, he won't if lennon's teeth start chattering.]
[ Lennon teases him but he... doesn't feel like having sex right now. He just wants to be close and to make sure everything's okay. He knows he can't fix every problem. But he'll try.
He shifts and leans to press a soft kiss to his lips before reaching to turn the water off. ]
[ Lennon asks and his voice is soft. There’s still something that
feels raw and vulnerable and he’s glad there’s no one else around to see
him right now. All his walls are down it feels like and he’s okay with
that. He trusts Daeshim. Daeshim loves him — and even if he can’t say it,
Lennon loves Daeshim too.
He allows Daeshim to wrap the towel and pulls it around himself tight for a
moment before he grabs one towel to give Daeshim and then a smaller towel
for his hair. He’s lost in thought, going through his post shower rituals.
He doesn’t look in the mirror. He tries never to when he’s undressed. He
glances at Daeshim and smiles. ]
You know most of them already.
[ Daeshim and him have worked through some and there’s not much more
to be said about them for the moment. ]
I think… not telling me about things that bother you upsets me the most.
Like about the showers… and you didn’t want me to work at the brothel but
never said anything.
[he's quiet for a long moment. it's that thoughtful sort of silence, the kind where daeshim is figuring out something about himself, and then trying just as hard at figuring out how to share it. he's come far, even if he still has far to go.]
I had to ignore it.
[he reaches up to catch lennon's face in his hands. he doesn't have to look at anything but him.]
Fae...aren't good to humans. Don't like them much. I don't want to become something that you don't like.
[ Lennon has to stop what he's doing when the other's hands move to his face. He stares at him. It's hard for him to accept that the other has to ignore it but doesn't he do the same thing with his own issues...? He'd be a hypocrite to call him out on that more. ]
[he needs to work hard. he needs to find a balance between communication and starving out those shadows by ignoring them. he guides lennon's face closer, tiptoeing if he must to press his lips against the human's forehead.]
You are very precious to me. Have I told you this?
Then I'm telling you now. You're my precious human. Wherever there is a you, I will find you.
[he's sure of it. daeshim finishes drying off quickly so that he can take lennon's hand, guiding him back to the bed. he scoots in, and then over, looking up to see if the other will join him.]
[ Lennon smiles again and it... makes him feel warm. Maybe sometimes the way the other used possessive language tended to rub him the wrong way but right now it's good. Daeshim is his... at least a little bit and he's accepting the fact that he is in fact Daeshim's.
One day, he's going to be able to tell Daeshim that he loves him.
he discards the towels he was using as they leave the bathroom and he's pulled along back to the bed. There's not any hesitation before he crawls in with him, pressing close immediately. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[he addresses that first because it's easy. he's only upset that he can't be a source himself. he doesn't want to think that lennon's only reason is the idea that he's donating in his place. other than that, it warms his heart more than anything.]
I think you're very generous for it. I'm grateful that he can count on you.
[and he knows that baein is grateful too, for many reasons. daeshim wraps his arms around him, trailing his fingers down along his spine. now, back to the other thing.]
I...would be pleased with that. You can always have sex for acorns instead! I have plenty!
[he laughs, giving his ass a little pat.]
no subject
I want to help him.
[ He understands Baein a lot...and well they're figuring out their own dynamic bit by bit.
He relaxes as the other's arms wrap around him and he rests his cheek on his shoulder. There's not long ago that he would have had trouble not turning this sexual. Where the intimacy and affection of just... being and holding someone you care about, being held and talking things through would have been too much. He's still skittish.
But Daeshim had given him a gift by telling him he loved him and then not pressing for him to say it back, not pushing the fact that he said it in his face over and over. It's the first time he'd heard that word toward himself in so long and it meant a lot, it meant just as much that Daeshim didn't attach pressure or expectation to his love.
Lennon laughs, and he lightly reaches back to swat at the other's hand and presses a kiss to the curve of the other's neck. ]
You don't have to give me acorns.
[ He'll talk to Jasper about his other options and he'll make sure that Daeshim is okay with what he definitely settles on. ]
no subject
[daeshim would give them to him. he'd share all his little treasures if lennon wanted them.
it feels nice like this, with nothing between them and no expectation of anything more. he gets the feeling that that's somewhat rare among humans, and even more so with lennon.]
We can get out, before you get too cold.
[just because he's enjoying it, he won't if lennon's teeth start chattering.]
no subject
[ Lennon teases him but he... doesn't feel like having sex right now. He just wants to be close and to make sure everything's okay. He knows he can't fix every problem. But he'll try.
He shifts and leans to press a soft kiss to his lips before reaching to turn the water off. ]
Is there anything else... that upsets you?
no subject
[daeshim looks down, wiggling his toes as the last of the water goes down the drain. it's clear now, and not pink like before.]
If there is, I don't remember it now.
[happiness has replaced it, daeshim snapping out of whatever daze he was in to reach for a towel to wrap around lennon.]
Do I...do things that upset you? [he looks up at him, the question not really sounding like a question.] I must.
no subject
If you remember, will you tell me?
[ Lennon asks and his voice is soft. There’s still something that feels raw and vulnerable and he’s glad there’s no one else around to see him right now. All his walls are down it feels like and he’s okay with that. He trusts Daeshim. Daeshim loves him — and even if he can’t say it, Lennon loves Daeshim too.
He allows Daeshim to wrap the towel and pulls it around himself tight for a moment before he grabs one towel to give Daeshim and then a smaller towel for his hair. He’s lost in thought, going through his post shower rituals. He doesn’t look in the mirror. He tries never to when he’s undressed. He glances at Daeshim and smiles. ]
You know most of them already.
[ Daeshim and him have worked through some and there’s not much more to be said about them for the moment. ]
I think… not telling me about things that bother you upsets me the most. Like about the showers… and you didn’t want me to work at the brothel but never said anything.
no subject
I had to ignore it.
[he reaches up to catch lennon's face in his hands. he doesn't have to look at anything but him.]
Fae...aren't good to humans. Don't like them much. I don't want to become something that you don't like.
no subject
You won't.
no subject
[he needs to work hard. he needs to find a balance between communication and starving out those shadows by ignoring them. he guides lennon's face closer, tiptoeing if he must to press his lips against the human's forehead.]
You are very precious to me. Have I told you this?
no subject
Maybe not in those exact words.
no subject
[he's sure of it. daeshim finishes drying off quickly so that he can take lennon's hand, guiding him back to the bed. he scoots in, and then over, looking up to see if the other will join him.]
no subject
One day, he's going to be able to tell Daeshim that he loves him.
he discards the towels he was using as they leave the bathroom and he's pulled along back to the bed. There's not any hesitation before he crawls in with him, pressing close immediately. ]